Does anyone else here give a shit about the World Cup? I know Ethan at least pretends to care, since that's the only way to have any chance of getting laid in Europe right now. ("Poland was eliminated? Shh, baby... Don't cry. Put your head on my shoulder and Ethan will make it all better...")

Since I'm math-retarded, the one thing I hate about World Cup is the fucking differential equations I need to do to figure out how my teams progress to the next round. I figured they both need to win to progress, but luckily someone at Wikipedia went into a bit more detail.

Croatia. They're going into their last match with only one point. They need a win to boot the Aussies back to Aussie-land. Technically, they might win and still be eliminated if Japan beats Brazil by 2 or 3 points. But since my sides hurt from laughing at the thought of that, Croatia's win will lock up second place in Group F.

Korea. Korea probably needs a win. A win would put them in first place in Group G. If they lose or tie, everything hinges on the Togo v. France match. And who the fuck knows what would happen then. Neither team has looked great in their matches. France should probably win, but in the past 8 years France and Togo have scored the exact same number of times in World Cup matches, so who can say. I'm hoping for a win from Korea so it doesn't end up going to a coin flip or something.

Is anyone still awake? Feel free to comment with your picks, or whine about how much you hate soccer because it preempts your favorite bass fishing show or something.