i had the most fucked up dream of all time. i was trapped in russia. russia deserves italics, to emphasize how fucked up it is to dream about being trapped in russia. it was ultralong and involved and russia of course was actually represented partially by the fictional city that always appears in my dreams with tons of on and off-ramps and highway overpasses and trenches. i'm not sure i want to get into it because it was kind of upsetting to be trapped in russia when all your friends are escaping and you are trapped in this crazy crazy house surrounded by the russian army shooting at you for no apparent reason, and your "keeper" yuri has abandoned you to go watch the superbowl with his friends and you are confused because the superbowl happened three days ago and you realize you have no money and you can't buy the winter jacket you want or a plane ticket home and you lost your luggage while walking back and forth between the crazy house and the grassy knoll a few miles away and things are just not good. it's not good to be trapped in russia.
posted at 11:37 AM

it was scary down the stretch but the pistons pulled it out tonight. i hope they have an easier time on friday (and that fat-oine doesn't come back like he said he would), because they need to have energy left the next night for the nets. and for me, of course.

the dog is seriously addicted to my bed. i thought i sent her up to bed when i went to finish the game an hour ago, but she came back to the basement and went to sleep on my bed. then she refused to get up and go to her bed when i came down and discovered her. i don't know if this is such a good thing. it probably just means i need to keep living here until she dies, because otherwise she'd be way depressed when i left.

"an-toine! an-toine! an-toine!"
posted at 12:19 AM

Sleepy Rummy: i cant tilt my head to the right
oppsie1: i told you sucking your own dick was dangerous.
Sleepy Rummy: yeah well
Sleepy Rummy: gotta test your limits

posted at 4:31 PM

this livejournal may be the most brilliant satire ever perpetrated on the internet, and that includes the kid who loves ninjas. my only regret is that i only stumbled across it today and not weeks ago when it was in its infancy, watching it gather steam and genius as each new element is introduced. it's great just because of the way she's managed to perfectly ape the angstwrit of 15 year olds, but it's much more than that. i mean, the creativity involved with some of the plot threads - and just when you thought it couldn't get any better, she FINDS JESUS. i am in awe. if i could write with that kind of juice i'd be richie rich for sure.

School was boring. I hate that place so much. Today in speech class some girl gave a speech about Conor and I walked out on her because on her posterboard she spelled his name "Conner." Stupid bitch has probably only been listening to him since this summer. I hate how everyone is constantly stealing my music.

i spent the day yesterday, after waking up at 630a, staring blankly at the computer for three hours and then crapping out 1050 words of awful on ss and morvern callar, trying to resurrect my poor, innocent, dead 20gb hd from my old computer. i have no idea what was really wrong with it, aside from me fucking it up a little more with some misuse of fdisk, but i think whatever it was must have been pretty bad since even winternals diskcommander couldn't fix it. that was my last hope aside from sending it off somewhere and paying a lot of money, which i would never do in a million years because i am superpo. after 8 hours of scanning and tinkering and praying - even after the excellent omen of finding my long lost nt4 cd - i decided it wasn't worth it anymore. deleted all the broken partitions, repartitioned, formatted, and now it's a part of this machine and i have 140gb of space.

chef josh and i almost went to see andrei rublev at the dia but we got stuck eating dinner at jacoby's and decided that was a better place to be given our moods, rather than sitting for three hours watching subtitled tarkovsky. then we came home and watched election, which he'd never seen.

actually i lied, the best part of yesterday was not the miracle of finding the nt4 cd. it was when the doorbell rang and fedex left me an envelope with four tickets to saturday's pistons-nets game. i can't wait. now accepting requests to join me. bring bribes.
posted at 11:31 AM

super sucker is a really bad movie, in case you couldn't tell from the title and the poster. i have to shit out 350 words on it, and i feel kind of bad because it was shot in michigan, but really that's kind of an embarrassment for michigan.
posted at 12:24 AM

my throat hurts so unbelievably bad. it's to the point where i get excited when my phlegm production goes up because it coats the painful rawness of my throat. i wish i knew what the source of this was. it's not strep, because i have no tonsils. i don't really have a cough, at least not an unmanageable chronic one, which is good because it kills when i do cough. and nothing else is wrong with me! what the fuck kind of illness is this?
posted at 6:15 AM

yeah. i'm sick. it's really just head congestion, making me a serious phlegmbot, but it sucks. i took an actifed that seems to be working, so i might go back to bed. it's mostly annoying because it's so mild in all other ways than being unable to breathe through nose without meds. i'd rather have a fullblown cold that burned bright and flamed out after a couple of days, instead of this, which is feeling ominously chronic.

i think it's probably his fault.

i'm tired. i woke up fifty times last night, probably because i was intermittently apnic. coast to coast wasn't even that good -- when i started listening at 1a, noory had some guy on who seemed to be encouraging mass remote prayer, and then when i woke up at 445a and put it on again, some british snipe named richard was giving advice to this woman who had been a "frequent abductee" and felt that she caused bad things to happen when she thought of them, like children falling down wells. tonight is open lines, which is my favorite kind of program, so hopefully that will yield better content.
posted at 11:37 AM

spent all night talking over archdale with bogin. it went well. he is a good bouncer of ideas. dougie and buck are much clearer to me now, even if i have no idea what happens.

the dog has finally crossed the line in my room. she realized that my bathroom is a bathroom and therefore has toilet paper, which she adores unraveling. so tonight is the first time she has unraveled my toilet paper. this means i can no longer leave my door open. poor dog. at least she didn't pee on my carpet.
posted at 1:36 AM

today's version of how my life can instantly become impossibly more shitty than it already was: i go to take a drink of water before i get into bed and somehow, i'm not even sure how, managed to dump the entire contents of the glass over the side of my nightstand. a glass. not a cup. a large, tall, huge glass. full of water. water that is wet. so it waterfalls off the side of the nightstand and onto the carpet below, and i've tipped it with such force that it also runs on my pillow, sheets and bedframe. then it runs along the bedframe and onto the carpet in other, harder to reach places. (i don't have a real bed, just a fold-away cot. don't ask. anyway, it's a simple metal frame not covered entirely by the dinky little mattress i sleep on, so the water traveled along it like a sewer.) i soaked up an entire large towel pulling water from the carpet and the nightstand and the bedframe and the pillow and the sheets and the mattress.

the worst part of all this is that when it happened, i kept on drinking. somehow even after i dumped out the contents of the glass, there was a little left and i continued to drink, all the while splitsecond planning what towel i should grab when i went in the bathroom. what is wrong with me?
posted at 11:31 PM

woke up at 5a to discover, yup, i'm sick. fucking mcchristballs. i'm so irate. i popped an actifed and slept until 1030a.

accomplished thus far today: emailed jnews about doing a first-person story on volunteering for israel, which i think would be a good experience for me and double excellent if i could get paid for doing it. i swore when i went to israel the first time i'd never go back because i hated it so much, but it's winter now and most of my complaints were centered around it being july ass hot. plus i can never resist the urge to do something as cool as working on an army base and being given idf clothing. also finally submitted an invoice for the recsports story of like a year ago. i am the deadbeat of all deadbeats, but that's money i could sorely use.

temp of almost 99. i don't feel feverish but i love taking my temperature, so i do it all the time. i usually run low around 98 anyway.

rest of day: rustle up an assignment, drink orange juice, work on archdale.
posted at 12:42 PM

my throat feels dry in a very suspicious way. if i come down with sarah's cold a mere two weeks after suffering through the flu, i will shit an entire house's worth of bricks.

i spent an hour wrestling with dad's computer trying to get it to be a good boy and take norton antivirus up the ass, but it repeatedly refused, even after i fucked with some stuff in the registry. i have no idea where norton is hiding whatever it's hiding that makes it think the full version of 2003 i installed is a trial version. and i know it's not, because i installed off the very same cd in my cpu, and it worked fine.

i got up early and wrote kj, then georgy porgy wrote back and said it wasn't due until next week. huh? it came out on friday. then he wrote back again and said why did i write 700 words on it. huh? YOU TOLD ME TO WRITE THAT MUCH ON IT BECAUSE WE WERE HAVING A LIGHT WEEK. arg. now he'll cut it down to half of what it is and it will no longer be at all amusing. goddammit.

pistons-pacers game>*. the new word of the week from the broadcast booth seems to be "firm" as in "that shot was too firm". what will greg and fred come up with next? fred looked even worse today. that hair dye job is just a bad idea from front to back, it's all patchy and kind of leopardy in a really bad way.
posted at 1:24 AM

i did ten pushups yesterday before my shower and now my muscles are sore. they're generally not sore after the gym despite all the weight machines i do, which leads me to believe i'm either not doing them right or old-fashioned pushups are just more effective. i'm going to keep up with the pushups before my shower, on top of the crunches i do, and try to increase the number.

gotta get up early to write 700 on kangaroo jack. yeah, i'm excited.
posted at 12:26 AM

i spent all day reading richard price/samaritan even though i really wanted to spend all day sleeping. i'm so tired and i had crazy dreams: treatises written by and about my middle school gym teacher (whose name was wrong in the dream), this princeton-esque rich boy who was my fiancee pouring 18 year old scotch into tiny shot glasses, a giant magician doing card tricks for the room handing me a card that had 9 clubs on it but also a row of hearts on top and then telling me to convert it so i rubbed it maniacally trying to turn the whole thing black and mostly failing, sitting perched high atop.. something, so that i was on eye-level with the giant magician.

anyway, i finished the book about half an hour ago. i started it yesterday at 5p. i rule! i barreled through it because it's a one-week loan since it's in "high demand". at least i didn't have to pay for it. some libraries in the area are starting to charge a rental fee for high-demand books. totes ridic.

babysitting next door in an hour because sarah duped me into believing she had committed to babysitting and then had to bail because of her family birthday party. this apparently is not the case, she was just thinking about babysitting for them. so now i get to miss the party and play with olivia and adam, which on second though is a much better fate than dinner with the extended family.
posted at 5:07 PM

i can't believe the pistons lost. what a shitfest! also, i think that fred mcleod has not only dyed his hair, but also has been spending way too much time in the tanning booth on top of being too heavily made up for the camera. he looked terrible. the only possible way he could have looked worse is if he was wearing a toupee.

twingo16: i am watching "A Walk to Remember." i'm sorry, but in what world does a girl who won't put out snag shane west while i sit and watch their sorry love story play out, alone on a saturday night? fuck you, hollywood.

posted at 2:04 AM

why can't i sleep? fucking fuck fuck.
posted at 5:50 AM

cable modem is down.

sigh.
posted at 12:50 AM

so tired. damn dog.
posted at 7:36 AM

i have a patented headache from hell. i took two aleve four hours ago that have done nothing. please kill me, or send vicodin.

it didn't really happen again last night, it just felt like it might. no worries, i'm a healthy baby girl.
posted at 11:56 PM

holy fuck, it's happening again. i guess it wasn't the tigan. hmm.
posted at 2:13 AM

feh. feh feh feh feh FEH. i really need to sleep.
posted at 1:50 AM

7:12 in the third, greg urges kvh to get off the "offensive schneid". whether or not he's referring to the schneid in question as insulting or that he just needs to score more is up for debate. also i forgot a fred schneid from the last game, but it was in regards to chucky iirc.

okay, so in the last post i facetiously wrote "ps i am a drug addict." FACETIOUSLY. little did i know.. i started back on the lex, but forgot that i should ramp up and so took two instead of on, and that made me really nauseous, so i took a tigan, and then a few hours later when i went to bed i took a wb, and half an hour that started going out of my fucking skull. all the leds in the room from my computer and such were dancing and blinking and moving, and then this net descended over everything and made it look like i was peering out into a 3d-modeled world with that crazy grid-thing you see in computer modeling programs that imply texture, and the room was way darker than it should have been, and the leds started strobing, and i felt like i was going to pass out and that something was seriously not right so i forced myself to jump out of bed and run upstairs to dad's room. i barely made it, almost fell down and passed out in the kitchen. dad didn't seem too concerned even though i told him i was having a drug reaction/od, and shelly was so dead to the world that she didn't even remember this afternoon when i told her what happened and was totally confused and shocked. i spent the next 45 minutes tripping on my parents' bedroom floor, seeing all sorts of animals and 3d effects on their bedspread and shit. i mean, bugs crawling on the wall-type hallucinations. it was CRAZY. it finally stopped a couple hours later. the weird thing is i never really wasn't lucid, i knew what was going on the whole time, and by the time it was over i was kind of bummed that it was. good thing i don't do hallucinogenics as a general rule.

i have my money on the tigan, because i've only take it once before and i've taken all that other stuff, together, plenty of times. beware, my fellow users.
posted at 8:58 PM

good goddy god! so i'm starting back on the lex, because i have been so fucking miserable the last week or whatever, and i started out with 20mg instead of 10mg because i'm dumb and it hit me like twenty tons of bricks. so nauseous i had to go get one of the tigan i got over the weekend for the remnants of my flu because i was thisclose to barfing. i gave up on the computer (it's actually all back together now and it looks like my old hd is a lost cause, sigh) and went to watch nypd to distact me and of course it was an episode involving a scalded-to-death dead baby. yeah, that didn't help much.

ps i am a drug addict. don't tell anyone!
posted at 11:47 PM

i feel so fucking ill. terry is now on the warpath to get me to move to la and make my fortune in screenwriting or something. he seems unaware that i am a shitty screenwriter and have no fresh ideas. my stomach hurts just thinking about how he's been duped. jesus fuck.

also my back is killing me from trying to install xp on my new desktop and everything is just a goddamn shambles, everything i touch turns to ash and stone. the second one thing gets fixed, the next thing breaks. and i'll not even get into the dad rental drama. oh wait, yes i will. when asked what his logic is for charging me $400/mo to live here, his response was "you paid $1500/mo to live in a dump in harlem". exact words, folks. how can you strike back at logic like that? it is just not possible to respond in any meaningful way. i really don't want to move out despite some people's encouragement, so i'm just going to hand him a check for what i have decided to pay him ($250) and he can take it or leave it. if he leaves it, i'll leave. the end.

i really hate january.

oppsie1: however, he is forgetful, which includes both forgetting he put it in his palm, and forgetting the palm itself. you can always mention me, and how wonderful i am.
oppsie1: which is a BLATANT LIE. i am so depressed.
oppsie1: i think i'm going to start back on this other med and see if it helps, my life is like a shame spiral of HELL.
oppsie1: we really need to write that hopwood screenplay too.
eliaspunch: yes
oppsie1: it should be about a 24 year old living with her parents who feels 12 and is TRAGICALLY DEPRESSED and jobless.
eliaspunch: and paying rent?
oppsie1: i have felt ill all day. i am so ill thinking about things.
oppsie1: yes, paying rent.
oppsie1: rent determined by the rent of her previous apt.
oppsie1: snort.
oppsie1: i just took some drugs, let's see if they KILL ME
eliaspunch: you know, your life is beginning to approximate that of mary camden.
eliaspunch: congratulations.
oppsie1: oh my god
oppsie1: i didn't realize
oppsie1: this is AMAZING
oppsie1: i am seriously flabbergasted
oppsie1: and emailing jill immediately!

posted at 1:19 PM

well, i appear to be only partly dead. hurrah.

i have had the stomach flu of death since new years eve morning. it was not food poisoning or nerves, it was actual stomach flu. i actually don't mind stomach flu that much, because i hate not being able to breathe and anything to do with my respiratory system, and because it helps you lose weight. i seriously have not eaten since 12/31, and anything i have eaten i puked back up pretty soon after. i haven't really done much of anything except mope around the house feeling ill. cancelled new years cooking at the house, etc. i did, however, go over to terry's on friday. his wife made dinner and i hooked up their wireless network, and we all three talked and hung out and after dinner watched the first two episodes of mscl, which when added all up basically means it was a top ten night. plus, in the middle of watching, the doorbell rang. at first we thought it was from the tv but i knew there was no doorbell sound at that point in the show and also the cat sprinted to the door, so we got up and looked and heard scrabblings and and saw footsteps in the snow and..

the bottom half of a mannequin (hereafter referred to as the halfequin), bronzed, but sprayed white from the groin up to where the torso was halved off. then we saw two carloads of kids drive off. it was really weird. we decided it was random, but terry was really worried somebody was mad at something he wrote. jeez. a halfequin.

it's sunday night, which naturally means i have work i've been putting off and will continue to put off until early tomorrow morning when i wake up. i saw the pianist again tonight in prep for writing review. damn, that's a good movie, i declare. i hope i don't have anything else to write but i have the sneaking fear that i do, so i just left a message for georgy porgy asking what the dealio. now, sleep.
posted at 11:57 PM